Psychology Questions

QWhy can't I find myself ?

I know the basics. My age (13) my name (Penny) my birthday, and other things like that. I have been highgly intelligent since, ever really... I mean, tests my parents had done showed it, and I was always much more mature compared to other people my age... But since I was young I had wanted to be an actor (I've given up dreams like that, I have been planning to get primarily a bachelor of science in psychology and criminal justice, and eventually go for a doctorate in either psychology or philosophy), and I would try to put on a role and see if people believed me, which they did. Believed that was the real me, or whatever I was acting was real. I kept it up, and nobody every suspected a thing. I started this when I was around 5. Anyways, I. The last couple years, I have been trying to figure out who I am, and I cannot do it. I have lost a sense of who I truly am... And I don't know how to find it... Now I feel like I am completely losing control of myself... If you look at the questions I've asked in the last few days, they are not at all like my usual self... The persona of which I seem to be losing control.a lot of the things I feel to be real feelings at first, get muddled up by the rest, and I can't tell if they are real feelings or fake ones my muddled brain is placing in my head... To act... To get attention? Considering my career choice, I have done some study on myself, and I have concluded that though I am not yet 18, I am already or can expect to be passive-aggressive psychopath with slight narcissistic tendencies. I really have no idea if what I am talking about now is even me, or another stupid personality I can't control. Is it like multiple-personality disorder ? I really have no idea. I can't tell if when I'm having a panic attack, it's real, or it's my stupid brain doing something else for no reason that isn't real! If I feel like I've lost my mind, I don't know if I really have or not, or if I'm faking myself.... And worst of all I can't even tell my therapist how I really feel, because I don't know, and if I saw all this, I just feel stupid.... Help me please?

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#1eric carriereAnswered at 2012-11-03 05:36:28
Well I tell you what, 13 is usually the age that you start finding yourself so it is completely normal that you are trying to figure yourself out, however I do think you feel that you feel lost more than normal. I don't think there is a day where you wake up and know who you are; I think you keep growing each day and learning more about yourself each day. I'm 15 and I have a very similar situation to you. I was always acting, and people did believe me too, however, now it has become a habit and I've lost contact with myself because of how much I am so focused on the role that I am playing with people. A few days ago, I decided to let go of the showing off part. Like I still imagined that i was in whatever scene I was in, but without the people seeing, and I don't think I've had a better feeling and warmth and contentment and stability. I was able to be in-tuned with myself, I was able to express how I really feel, and I felt so authentic and real. You may wanna start doing that - start letting go of how people would view you, and think inwards instead.

I don't think I was much help, but I hope I helped!
#2FizzixAnswered at 2012-12-01 17:59:04
13 * no * is known to be a time when people are usually like someone just said. It's actually the beginning of a time of turmoil in his life , his teenage years that changes a LOT carried out ! You worry too much about things . Focus on the things that make you feel happy , those are the things that define who you are . People change and evolve throughout life . interests and different things make them happy at different times in their lives for different reasons . You do not have to know what you want to be when you're 13 . some people , others have an idea and most do not know anything ! You have plenty of time to change your mind as well , even if decided one thing ! Many people even start college with undeclared racing because not even sure at that point ! Stop worrying about what might be wrong one day. Focus on the here and now . These things mentioned are not what happens to you and no one knows what can happen . What you are is what makes you happy , hgow treat others and what is important to you in life. Keep it simple and relax , you're doing fine .
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